I dont care anymore
Original Poster: BLACK PANTA
Forum: McDojo Dicussion
Posted On: 28-08-2006, 20:54
Orginal Post: BLACK PANTA: Why can't I open a Mcdojo. I mean look at how much money they make of suckers. Dammit I suck enough to open a Mcdojo. Whose with me.
Post: angryrocker4:
Im with you!!! I'll teach a viking berzerker class!! We can also have a rainbow belt system with kung fu tops and camoflauge pants with sandles!!!!>
Post: BLACK PANTA:
yeah man, who else...who else wants to bask in the fountain of money brought to you by the Mcdojo way.>
Post: samurai6string:
I'll teach a class in super secret street ninjustsu that's been outlawed by the government. However this is too deadly to practiced in class, although i can train you up to blackbelt level in 3, 30 minute sessions.>
Post: opariser1001:
dude i'm totally with you!
i'll teach how to beat up some guy who insulted you! but it's only for dumbass high school students who are fighting for pride! one 10 minute session for a hundred dollars and they'll be able to beat up any high school asshole.>
Post: asag2:
A step in the right direction of preserving the arts.....nice job PANTA>
Post: Hengest:
I could do a twice weekly class in Fuk Yu Pal, the fighting art of the noble Fat Limey. It will be the first time this "closed door" art has been available to the public. This style is unbeatable! It's teachings revolve around the philosophy that the best defence is offence, and the best offence is surprise. Therefore you attack people before they've even thought of attacking you! Techniques include:
1) Headbutting people in mid-sentence.
2) Using a broken bottle to win the advantage over someone who hasn't even noticed you're there.
3) Combined attacks, working with other exponents of the style to defeat a single opponent.
4) Striking an already unconcious opponent.
I say again, this style is unbeatable! Take advantage of this once in a lifetime opportunity! Only $1,500 a month plus a one-time $3,000 enrollment fee!!>
Post: nbotary:
DUUUDDE!!!! I'm SOOOO in!!! I know a TON of studens who would be foaming at the mouth to learn!!! I've even got some great classes lined up - (Australian accent to follow... ) Check it out!!!
1. "Laughing Sucker Punch"
2. "Tie Your Shoes Groin Strike"
3. "Ear Scratch Straight Punch"
4. "Kicking Your Oppenent In The Back When It's Turned To You"
5. "Loogie In The Eye"
6. "The Sodomizer" - don't ask...
Let me know what you think!!! I just want a piece of the pie for teaching my deadly techniques. Panta what's your cut? Is it your school and the rest of us are guest instructors or how does this all work out?>
Post: setsu nin to:
I was thinking to start with McDojo many times. Its best way to get money. I was thinking to do that because with McDojo I could get all money for my training and for working with group real martial arts for free. But than if you start with something like that you will be marked as McSensei for all life, and I dont want that.>
Post: angryrocker4:
haha, setsu took it seriously :)>
Post: nbotary:
I'm just surprised that nobody has actually bothered to ask what "The Sodomizer" technique is... :o :lol:
I figured that would be a dead giveaway that Panta wasn't serious... :lol:>
Post: BLACK PANTA:
Listen all of you are just my student teachers. I am the Soke of Soke. I am the Grand Ultimate Super Master. All will yield to me.........or at least give me right of way.>
Post: BLACK PANTA:
[quote=setsu nin to I was thinking to start with McDojo many times. Its best way to get money. I was thinking to do that because with McDojo I could get all money for my training and for working with group real martial arts for free. But than if you start with something like that you will be marked as McSensei for all life, and I dont want that.[/quote
No really tho that's a good point. the point I was really thinking b4 making this thread. I just turned it into a joke.>
Post: Tease T Tickle:
I would start up a McDojo to take people's money, but I'm already deeply involved in a gambling, drug smuggling and baby punching cartel. Yes, we punch babies. Right in the face.
But, for those of you who want a little Triple T in your McDojo, please use the following super-deadly techniques from my repertoire:
* Drunken Monkey Becomes Angry Dragon - Taking a shot of high-proof vodka, igniting a zippo and then spraying your victim with an alcoholic fireball.
* Fountain of Tyr - Chopping off your own left hand to blind your enemy with the arterial blood. (Actual Berserker technique, Rocker!)
* The Pirate Drop - Slamming your opponent, ass-first, on an overturned table or stool so that they have a wooden leg sticking out of their ass.
* The Devastator - Pee in his butt.>
Post: samurai6string:
alright, i'll fess up, one of those super deadly illegal ninja techniques is really just a Dirty Sanchez, but it's still a great submission move.>
Post: Gangsta_Nerd:
I KNOW THIS IS OLD.....but this made me laugh so hard I had to join in:
I'm willing to be Black Panta's partner in his McDojo & I expect 50% of the profits, because I will be teaching THE SUPER SAIYAN technique's:
Super Saiyan 2
Super Saiyan 3
Mystic Saiyan
Golden Oozaru
Super Saiyan 4
If you are lucky, I might even turn into a Guerilla and shoot fire balls out of my mouth.
P.S. Dragon Ball Z fans should get the joke :lol: >
Post: JH:
Quote: Yes, we punch babies. Right in the face.
:lol:>
Post: nbotary:
Tease - I can't believe you would actually teach "The Devastator" technique!!! Sorry, but I think I want to skip that class!!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:>
Post: BLACK PANTA:
[quote=nbotary Tease - I can't believe you would actually teach "The Devastator" technique!!! Sorry, but I think I want to skip that class!!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:[/quote
All students are required to attend all classes...failure to do so will result in punishment via the Devastator......If you wish to be exempted from class, you will have to write a letter to Soke of Sokes Black Panta, while in the presence of Soke of Sokes Black Panta, while he performs the righ of excuse. (pretty much another name for the Devastator.)>
Post: Stazzy:
Haha, I had the idea of starting a McDojo in the future after reading this forum. But then again, I'd have to compete with the greats like Grandmaster Chuck Sullivan. I don't know if I can handle such stiff competition. As great as the money would be, I think a couple of people I know might want to kill me if I ever decide to go through with it. :wink: :x
Edit: My trademark technique would be the Reagan Smash.>
Post: Haas:
can i join ^_^ ill teach people how to learn drunken kung fu from video games>
Post: Gazelle:
Great thread!>
Post: darkside05:
Ok Nbotary, I'm going to be the jerk off that asks what "the Sodomizer" is but I have a hard time seeing it being any worse than Tease's "Pirate Drop">
Post: nbotary:
It's a simple technique really....
First, you begin by getting your opponent into position to apply a rear naked choke. After said choke is applied successfully, you put your opponent face down and ass up in the air. Give them a good swift kick right in their chocolate starfish. At this point, you yank their pants down, take their hands and make them wipe their own ass with their bare hands. Then you take out a cucumber or a banana or some other phallic looking object, put a condom on it and slather it with lubricant until it coats everthing it touches and put that in their hands. Afterwards, you tickle their nose or use some other form of stimulant to revive them, at which point they will undoubtedly wipe their nose with their hand or the object you put in it. Make sure you have a camera handy for the revival. They will wake up with a hand that smells like shit, a sore ass, and a lubricated object with a condom on it. They won't know what the fuck happened becuase they were out cold. They will think that they were "sodomized". Afterwards, threaten to release photos of the "sodomizer" on the net if they don't cough up some sort of ransom. After it's paid, send them a picture of a birthday cake or something. You will have just sodomized them twice!!! :wink: :lol: :twisted:>
Post: The BadBoy:
Can I wear a Golden Gi? Oh and have a throne?>
Post: Haas:
Cool Idea :D>
Post: darkside05:
Hmm Nbotary... as evil cruel heartless coldhearted and just plain down right mean the Sodomizer is... I have to put my vote on the Pirate Drop. Simply because I could actually remotely see it happening in real life (and the thought makes me cringe very much...).>
Post: lakan_sampu:
The sodomizer...
you put the MIGHT in SODOMIGHT....
a pre-technique proper can be used...
Throw down a soap next to the opponent's feet and ask him to pick it up. When he bends over, get over behind him and apply NB's sodomizer..>
Post: Haas:
eww>
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